Making a decision(in progress)
Right now, Im undergoing a process of growing,changing,improving,adding and subtracting.I have to admit,NS has been very tough for me.Not in training but all the people around.There are many people that I cant love un condtionally but I loved the way how Holy Spirit says it," do you love for the sake of loving or are you really loving those God loves?" I seriously not fully sure what is God doing in my life but I know its for my own growth.God put the most hated person in my bunk as my buddy.I really gave the best I could.There are so many different people.I believe God wants me 2 upgrade my character.And the only thing for me to grow is problems,problems that involve me putting in tremendous amount of hurts.Who are this people? That I must care for? They have been taking me for granted,take advantage of my character that benefits them.The more I try to be mean,the more Im caring for people. Ok , I dont want to elaborate anymore.
Im going through changes.In terms of how I usually do.I feel that I have no more emotional strength to keep giving.I guess Im abit greedy for my expectation. Well, not anymore , I think.
Sathya will change.Sathya shall not be as open as before.I dunno what awaits of me.Im still thinking ........ still deciding ......
I went to find the guys at CCK park.My heart jumped for joy when I saw them.I really felt happy to see them.And I really want to thank 'aunty' and 'pig' for 'bullying' me. Ty for being 'selfish'.It really helped me to stand up.'aunty' never fail 2 intentionally encourage me.And 'pig' never fail to unintentionally encourage me ( laughs out loud) Ill ran in this race with God definitely! I will surely jiayou in the KOG. :P
I dun feel like posting anymore.I may close down my blog.I dunno whats my purpose of this blog for now . see how first..... what a stress-filled post.
*i dun wanna expect.I dun wanna seek.I dun wanna want it.Therefore i wont be hurt,broken or teared down.I guess. it feels better this way :P..... needs a *** ..... *
*i wish God send you earlier be4 'that'. i hope is this year.please accompany me '
loving Jesus whole-heartedly
