sathya's not GAY!


i was reading sum1's blog by surfing ... basically this ppl were around me and i didnt noe them well ...... and they said i was gay and i suan them all this and ask me be a man can? tis is the worst thing a girl can say to a guy that hes gay ...... zzzzz ... ok ok ... in tat case sure sure ... ill be a real man den .... if being nice,sensitive,funny,crappy,gentleman,caring all tis isnt manly for me den sure .. for ur sake i will not ... den hor dun expect me 2 entertain u guys or either seeing me smile .... ill be dead serious like a guy ... a worldy guy only to tis certain group ..... rarely guys r really friendly .... if tats a sin to u guys den FINE lor ..... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ......


above post ... dun worri lar im seriously pissed off! such judgemental statement ... oh well God ... i only ask only that u forgive them and healed my heart ..... they r still young and dunno me tat well and seeing ppl like me gives them different impression i guess .... im not insecure lar no worries :D .... and my below post is between me and God plz ignore it ... and one more thing .. I DUN AA or im not so INSECURE! if u wanna noe u ask me urself ... dun jump to conclusion ... zZzZzZzZ


argh! God! im simply jealous! not even a Hi.But but :( ... am i being to possessive?abit bah ... i cant stand what isnt not mine completely.but that person very innocent ... i jump 2 conclusion haha! but hor God ... hurted alot lar... u noe me mah ... i really desire relationship wif ppl ... deep relationship ... NOT BGR lar but close friendship wif those ppl that i can talk spiritual stuff openly ....... sumtimes.... nope many times i aint able 2 attain that ...... I remembered Dewen taking the personality test wif the brothers during last time brother's night(i missed that). and mine was i have alot of surface relationship but rarely deep ones .... so TRUE! God u noe i desire deep relationship man! i dun want BGR ... if marriage is 1+1=more than 2 .... den my brothers and sisters can help me rite? i declared be4 Justin's DMM that i want follow Paul's example ... Evangelise places where ppl have not hear the Gospel and Singlehood ........ :D gift of celebacy man! hahahz but though tis desire is in me ... i noe i can live it thru u... i only wanna make U my everything but how come if i share to you God ... sumtimes/most times i dun feel comforted? arent u my everything? but why i share to my brothers and sisters i feel better? why why? i just wish 2 stay in a room and do QT till i die .... i cant stand what isnt mine hahaha! .... over-possessive abt relationship wif ppl i guess..... eek! plus God u put my spirit in a indian body! waHA! tat sounds so lame! but hor true mah ... because of tis i have already have a barrier of friendship already ......... saddening ... God what u want me 2 do?????????????????????????? dun tell me tat tis is ur hurt again ... rubbish! tis is how u created me ... if i cant .... i .........oh well ...... up to lar! ill say once den .... haiz ......... up to u lar GOD!


haha! service is always GREAT! i love praising and WORSHIPPING God! ......*skipskipskip*
went to Mac to play tai-di while sum ppl studied ... *zk u left without saying BYE! EWWW* play tai-di like 4hrs ++ sia wt lar ... got headache from all those laughing and thinking of what combo 2 play .... but den i dunno what happen sia! i lose two match so jialat! i didnt even throw one card AT ALL! WA LAO! one card also cannot arh?! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz LOL! how can lar ! im tai-di king leh :D den later going home i ps keith,jogina and gina .... really sorri guys! my spirit was down and accused! i had 2 cool off walking wif kaien they all... :( ... den after that they say they were playing pool ... i got 2 noe 3 new ppl :D .... anyways walk walk den sherry(if im not wrong) told me "u feel cheated that we not going to play pool?" i was like "what? den where we going now?" she said " we just walk walk den take NR further away only" i was like " WA LAO my leg pain liao stand and walk so long now also walk ..." anyways walked another 1hr!(wif 2 minutes break because we were arguing abt the womens in the VAIO advertisement whether they were all the same person) drank Ribena wif lemon .. but tasted like polka ice lemon tee .... den i took the bus alone ... and i felt super secured and good .. i realised i loved all fellowship ... good or bad as long as wif ppl around me ... but i always loved being alone ... tats when i got to think/spend/talk to God :D and i really loved his presence around me ..... coz i had to settle my Soul den my spirit( if u dunno the difference ask me ... teres a difference between soul and spirit) ... loved it!


let me mention sumthing ... while i was playing tai-di ... i was so called ears-dropping the conversion between the north leaders ... and their convictions make me soooooo good ... they were really talking deep spiritual stuff on how 2 grow all tis ... and i really desired that! i really long 2 share or talk deep deep deep spiritual stuff wif sum1 ..... i just wished that God will give me a friend ... a buddy 2 talk wif every day abt spiritaul life and our life :D i just pray that God gives me a buddy .... i aint care who is it!i aint care is brother/sister but u must accept anything from me :D and i noe u are secure and so am i! FRIENDSHIP WOO! (once again ... plz plz plz plz plz dun make judgemental thoughts nor ever think sathya's AA ... ill eat u alive! ^^ )


FORGET ABOUT MY ABOVE POST!! ARGH!!!!! fed -up :( Zzz bleah awww ....shot ... dead .......


God loves u really :D


off 2 basketball! CHILLS