Thursday, May 08, 2008
Being a CL possible before camp?
usually my serious posts will be the end :D so share what happen as normal den get to the pt lor?why... want beat me arh? <--- lame
today woke up 8:30 due to my brother entering the room and was woke up by it.I actually very very sensitive to environment i think.Because no matter how tired i am im easily woken up by even the softest hello.Try me when i sleep,just say 'hello' and i cant sleep for another two hrs ... yea yea... i cant sleep after lying on the bed straight ... gotta lie down like hrs be4 i fully submerged myself into deep sleep. But during my sleep also i still think but think slowly.I dunno when i truly sleep without not thinking.
anyways woke up and went 2 find weixian 2 share Christ together.And i saw massive amount of students and TEACHERS! Oh man ... couldnt do peanuts ... so i told weixian i decided to go cck and share Christ though i dunno the chances i'm able 2 share because Weixian said she try evaxing be4 and no ppl.And because of that my faith decreased abit but den i like this kind of doubt in my heart.This will make God more real in my life and God can work thru my doubts.So i went cck and wanted 2 share to fajar ppl.But i didnt find many.And i saw two Chestnut student of them walking around.So by faith i just went to share.You know what? They received Jesus into the life man! weet weet! den after that i shared to another two chestnut.But they reject.Share to another 3 bpgh students ... rejected ... my spiritual energy completely drain ... i felt like going home that i ask God 'should i go home?" den God told me "go home also dota or slack rite? might as well stay" ... den all of a suddeny i let two person by-pass me ... i lost all my spiritual energy sharing! so i went to a corner and prayed again and tapped upon God's power ... den i saw one chestnut student after 30minutes den i shared to him ... he also received Christ! amen amen! and all the 3 chestnut converts knew each other! retention level = ^^^ ! higher! weeeeeeeeee ! evaluationg ... 3chestnut,3fajar,2west spring plus me = 9 plus shawn = 10 ! but i hope 2 retain them! i wanna rise up again man! im dreaming big and planned in advanced for many activities 2 do during CG! im so excited! i scared 2 say tis in public because if i dun keep my word or not managed 2 achieved it ... very malu like tat but who cares? Once a guy says,he usually wont backdown now so if saying it increases my commitment so why not? i wanna rise up to be a UL by end CG08! if possible be4 that ... i noe its not gonna be easy... i noe i gotta sacrifice alot of things but i have put my life into God's work.But even if i dun become whatever L ... i will still want 2 work for God 2 get my rewards! yay me!
i was watching indian movie.And the hero in the movie became very sucessful and he said "ppl used to say every man's sucess,theres a women behind for it" den i thinking my so called sucess today thru God was thru a women as well ... FONG YEE!!! LOL!!! im kidding ya? im being naughty and random , but hor her encouragement ytd really spurred me 2 leave my house, coz i dun wanna hurt God,dun wanna let my leaders down,and now dun wanna let her down also, im too ppl-oriented liao hahahahaz! ... rejection and words really affect me alot ... hehez! but wanna say ty again fong yee! u came into my life, we talk,we fellowship,u encourage,den u empower me thru Holy spirit,now ur a blessing man! teeheez!
i was very puzzeled why encouragement really had so much power,so did prayers ... i felt the full effect or maybe the most today.And i read John C Maxwell a few hrs ago(be4 i went into nappy) den encouragement brings the best out of ppl ... i guess it did work on me as well ...and as i shared i feared nth,no nervousness,no shy no nth!I begged holy spirit 2 just work thru me ..... im really useless alone. Whatever i have done or doing,its all Holy spirit working not me.I cant do NTH! i was useless and unworthy but thru jesus i gain every kinds of wealth.I was encouraged by verses presented to me Gala 6:9 mat 5:11-12 and i just read Col chapter and Col 3:2,Col 3:23 col 3:17 philip 3:13-14 and most impactful was Col 3:23 and ALOT more lar .... God suddenly threw all the promising and encouraging verses to me.I thank God,My lord,the creator of heavens and everything on earth 2 use nothing such as me to do something tat im not worthy for me 2 even talk abt.I ty Jesus for tis wonderful privillaged to work for U.its definitely my pleasure and honor 2 be ur servant,ur labourer,ur ambassador and especially ... being ur child :D TY!
i really wanna grow grow grow!(growing spiritually) now i wanna also grow grow grow(both quality and quanity). for sum reason i just wanna say jiayou WA and everyone! especially my sheep bernard! jiayou jiayou! everyone JIAYOU JIAYOU! DUN GIVE UP ANYTHING GOD HAS PLACED IN UR HEART TO DO!!!
*to be continued*
10:20 PM
I never will leave You ~
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